David: Hi can I help you?
Regis: Guess who I am?
David: Oh my god…
More »David: Hi can I help you?
Regis: Guess who I am?
David: Oh my god…
Regis: Guess who I am?!
David: It’s Regis Philbin.
Regis: It’s not Regis, it’s Shrek!
David: How ya doing buddy?
Regis: Biggest mistake I ever made. Two and a half hours sitting across the street putting this on. Another two hours waiting in the green room while you’re staring at Beyonce’s earrings. Big, big mistake!
David: You look like Becky Hackick after a bad clam.
Regis: Honest to God I’m sitting there and I’m saying Dave is right across the street he’ll enjoy…are you playing with my horn? Get out of there.
David: Why are you doing this Regis?
Regis: Because I thought you’d enjoy this. I don’t think so. I don’t think so.
David: Well I am enjoying it. Why don’t you and I go get a couple of whores?
Regis: You know Regis would probably say no but Shrek is ready.
David: I can tell Shrek is ready.
Regis: Alright well I just wanted to come by and say…keep ignoring me.
David: You know who was here the other night what’s her name Kelly Lee.
Regis: Kelly Ripper! Honest to God she was here?
David: I like her she’s very nice.
Regis: You like everybody don’t you?
David: No not really.
Regis: What a fuss you make over Beyonce. Oh my God.
David: Well she’s beautiful, 10 Grammys, and did you see the beautiful face. What a sweet lovely face.
Regis: You kept staring at her earrings. Anyway how do I look? Tell me.
David: You look fine.
Regis: We’re doing on our show…
David: Who cares?
Regis: See what I mean. Why bother? My idea let me go over and visit with Dave. He’ll like this.
David: You just came over for the free coffee.
Regis: We’re doing a week of shows, Broadway shows. So anyway…here I am. Alright I’m going to go home now.
David: Regis Philben ladies and gentleman.
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